When exactly is it in life when you expect that your becoming an adult? For me I think I\'m still in transition. I am ready for the real world but I still trying to get use to being responsible. I got a job for the responsibility and to make money but when I should be accounting for how much money I make I simply slack off. In fact I don\'t even do it. I should also be saving but I can\'t even do that. Once I get my check I am ready to spend it and regret it later when I\'m broke. There have been many times when I had to resort to the change in my ashtray for gas money.

Growing up is something that I look as bittersweet. It\'s great that that I am going to have responsibility and have more control of my life, but I also scars me. What if I fail? What if I make those bad decisions? I\'ve never been a very responsible person, I look to other for help and for guidance but I am going to have to start doing it on my own. Responsibility isn\'t hard but its something I have to get use to. Having a job is great. You have money, you have responsibility but I can\'t say Well, I don\'t feel like working today so I\'m not going in. It is a commitment and maybe that\'s something that I had a problem with simply because a feeling of being trapped. The feeling that you have an obligation that you must keep.

Not all commitments are negative. A lot of these commitments help you grow as a person. The best example of that is a relationship of mine. This relationship has help me grow in so many ways, it is the best thing that has happen in my life. I have learned that youíre not the only one that matters in the world and as soon as I got into this relationship I all of a sudden reset my priorities. I look at what really mattered to me, and I put myself at the bottom. Itís not because I had no self-esteem or I wasnít worth it but because there are things in life that are more important than just myself. I became more considerate. I\'m still not as considerate as I would like to be but I\'m working on it. I put the people that were the most important to men at the top because I knew that they would be there for me when I needed them. I may not have always been there for them but they are still there for me because they really care about me. Even if we got into a fight an hour ago, those people are willing to drop for the sake of you and your feeling and that is truly when you know that you are loved.

A problem that I was only able to see in retrospect is that I never really a good listener. It\'s one thing to hear something but it\'s another to just listen for many people (mostly guys). A lot of the time people just want you to listen and understand them, not try and fix it. They want you to understand what they are taking about and you canít really focus on what they are talking about and trying to figure out a way to solve it at the same time. I doesnít take much to listen. There are a lot of time when people just want to tell you what\'s on their mind, whether they have a problem or not. Itís a feeling everyone loves. Being heard. Being able to know that someone can see it the way you see, knowing someone can relate.

Another big problem that I had was that I never was really open with people. I never shared my problem with the people that cared about me. I simply felt "well; itís my problem. I should deal with it." Why burden anyone else with my problems? But what I didnít see was that I was hurting the people around me. When you know something is wrong with someone and they wonít tell you, you will feel